9 Sex Positions for When You’re Way Different Heights

Some of the most iconic couples of all time have major height differences. Think: Nicole and Keith, Tom and Zendaya, Joe and Sophie, Kristen and Dax…the list goes on. Plus, how many people are exactly the same exact height as their partner? Regardless of who’s taller, height differences are normal and usually pose no issue in the relationship whatsoever, unless the tall/short divide is affecting your sex life. If your height difference is making sex more difficult, awkward, or just turning you off entirely because you don’t know how to position your bodies, these sex positions for height differences can help.

First and foremost, relax. “Don’t feel you need to be perfectly aligned. Get creative and enjoy the height differences to engage in a variety of sex acts—from using toys and oral sex, to hand jobs and mutual masturbation,” says Jess O’Reilly, PhD, resident sexologist at Astroglide.

Here are some tips to get you started on your sexy height difference journey.

Work the angles

Whether your goal is penetration, oral, or sexy rubbing, you have options for how you fit or place your bodies together. There are loads of position variations you can try depending on how you and your partner are most comfortable. It might mean just getting Body Part A into or against Body Part B, or focusing on meaningful eye gazing and sensual touch. “Anything that has bodies set at interesting angles can be great for fitting bodies together and letting the rest of the limbs work themselves out,” says Elizabeth Dell, a certified sex educator and founder of Amorus, a relationship and intimacy app. Try variations on cowgirl/reverse cowgirl or sideways scissors.

Try a swing

I know they might seem intimidating, but sex swings are your friends! “You can experiment with new angles with a swing, as you can adjust it to different heights,” says O’Reilly. You don’t have to go full BDSM if you don’t want to—they can also just act as a tool to position you or your partner properly. If a mouth, penis, vulva, boob, butt or toy is not where you want it, hoist or lower that swing and get things going.

Use props

Say yes to sex pillows and wedges, as well as strategic use of counters, dressers and chairs. “Chairs may be the great equalizers when it comes to enjoying sex between partners with great height differentials,” says O’Reilly.

Talk about what does it for you

ICYMI, communication = sex that is so much better. If you tell your partner what you like, and they feel comfortable doing that for you, you win! “Is it grinding? Bumping? Sliding? Where does that grinding feel best? On your clit? Along the underside of your penis? At the high back left side of your vagina?” says Dell. “This can be as simple as telling your partner what specifically felt great after sex. For example, ‘I loved when you were on top and twisted just slightly left.’”

Here are some positions to try with your much taller or shorter partner.