Quick question: Have you ever been in the throes of sexual passion, deep in the moment, and gotten really turned on by the idea of, uh, getting pregnant? Or maybe you’ve been really giving it good to your partner and the possibility that you could impregnate them gives you a thrill.
If this sounds in any way familiar, you might have a breeding kink. This kink eroticizes unprotected sex, either anal or vaginal. “Some people eroticize the experience of receiving and holding ejaculate, others focus on the risk of pregnancy and not knowing if conception has happened,” says Celina Criss, PhD, a certified sex coach specializing in BDSM and GSRD. A breeding kink often plays with D/s (Dominant/submissive) power dynamics in a way that can feel hot, intense, and a little bit dangerous. Like all sex acts, engaging with a breeding kink involves informed, negotiated, and enthusiastic consent from all partners.
If you’re a little bit confused about what exactly this all means, don’t worry. Breeding kinks are nuanced, explains psychotherapist and certified sex and couples therapist Lee Phillips, LCSW, adding that there are a lot of things people tend to get wrong when it comes to both conceptualizing this kink and practicing it safely.
Whether you’re into breeding or just curious what it’s all about, there’s a lot to know about this kink, and a lot of misconceptions to clear up. Let’s dive into what a breeding kink actually is, why people are into it, and how you can engage with it in a safe way.
What Exactly *Is* a Breeding Kink?
First, a quick (and kinky) refresher for you. A kink is anything typically non-sexual that causes sexual arousal. Think: Leather, high heels, bondage, spanking, and, yes, breeding.
The difference between a kink and a fetish is that a kink is something that enhances sexual arousal. It’s something you enjoy and want to be a part of sexual experiences, but you don’t necessarily need it to get off or otherwise feel sexually satisfied. A fetish, on the other hand, is when the object/act needs to be present in order to reach your peak erotic state. You may be able to enjoy sexual encounters that don’t include the fetish object/act, but they won’t be as pleasurable.
As for breeding kinks: “A breeding kink refers to the intense arousal at the thought of being impregnated or impregnating someone,” says Emerson Karsh, a kink expert and educator. A breeding kink means you are literally turned on by the idea of becoming pregnant during sex, or of making your partner pregnant.
This means wanting someone to ejaculate inside of you—or wanting to ejaculate inside of your partner—either as fantasy or reality. This kink can be practiced by any couple/groups of any and all genders.
It’s worth noting that many folks with a breeding kink do not actually wish to become pregnant, and many use some form of birth control. This kink is often more about the risk, intimacy, and potentially dominant/submissive aspects of unprotected sex than an actual desire to get pregnant.
Why Are People Into ‘Breeding’ During Sex?
If you’re someone who has spent most of your sex-having life actively trying to avoid pregnancy, the idea of being turned on by that risk might seem confusing—especially in the aftermath of the landmark overturning of Roe v. Wade, when the stakes are higher than ever. That said, there are all kinds of reasons people may be into a breeding fantasy—ones that may or may not have to do with any desire to actually become pregnant. There are countless reasons someone might be interested in breeding, but here are some of the most common.
Danger and Risk
“For some people, it’s undoubtedly about the risk involved with unprotected sex and pregnancy, as danger can be a huge turn on,” says Rea Pearson, a sex-positive BACP-accredited counselor and relationship therapist specializing in gender, sexuality, and relationship diversities.
Science backs this up, BTW. When we’re frightened, our bodies respond by releasing adrenaline. Research has shown that fear and pleasure are actually quite closely related in the brain. When we experience the intensity of fear, it can cause a sexual response.
Power Dynamics/BDSM
As we previously mentioned, there’s often an element of dominance and submission at play in a breeding kink; it’s about giving and receiving control. In breeding Dom/sub-type power-play, one partner is controlling the other to make them pregnant, Pearson says.
There may also be a feeling of primal instinct involved. “A breeding kink is about using a uterus in its intended way—pregnancy—through domination,” says Karsh. “It reflects the centuries-long idea of ownership that is associated with pregnancy.”
A thing for breeding might also be related to a degradation kink. “Breeding kinks degrade or isolate a person to just their reproductive organs/body, which can be arousing for those who enjoy objectification and degradation,” says Karsh. “[It’s this] concept that ‘you’re only good for your uterus and child bearing.’”
Niche Fantasy Play
Some folks with a breeding kink might also be into more meta, fantastical implantation scenes—like being abducted by aliens and impregnated with an extraterrestrial spawn, for example. What can we say? When it comes to what turns people on, we can get very creative in these wild and wonderful human brains of ours.
Connection and Intimacy
For some breeders, the desire to form a deep emotional and physical connection to their partner could be the main erotic motivator behind a breeding kink. It’s “the tethering sensation with their partner” that some breeders crave, says professional kinkster, Mistress Kye. “They enjoy the ‘we are one’ feeling of entering into something dangerous together.” Plus, the practice of not pulling out can also have an erotic charge, adds Philips.
How Are Breeding Kinks Practiced?
First and foremost, breeding kinks are practiced with intentional, enthusiastic, and fully negotiated consent. “Because the stakes are so high," Kye says, direct and honest communication leading to mutually established boundaries is paramount before any play begins.
As for how it all actually goes down, these kinks are usually practiced with a penis or a dildo, wherein the “breeder” ejaculates inside the vagina/anus of the submissive partner. The ejaculation can be real, fantasy (where you ‘pretend’ to ejaculate, but don’t), or done with a dildo that shoots fake sperm/eggs (yes, that’s a thing).
“People can explore it however they want—as solo play or with a partner or multiple partners,” Pearson explains. “It might be something they think about or discuss during masturbation or sex, or they might play out a whole scenario. It’s entirely up to the imagination and sexual tastes of the people involved.”
Those who practice this kink may choose to use protection such as condoms, pills, implants, or patches, depending on their desires. Again, consent and discussions around this are crucial.
Common Misconceptions About Breeding Kinks
As with most sex things, there are plenty of misconceptions surrounding breeding kinks, so let’s set the record straight.
People Who Practice Breeding Are Being Unsafe
People who practice breeding kinks usually take pregnancy/STI prevention methods. It’s about playing with risk, not necessarily actually taking unnecessary risk. “Many people who have breeding kinks have no desire to conceive but instead enjoy the fantasy, the idea of pregnancy, power dynamics, and other kinks at play,” says Karsh.
Now, some people who practice breeding kinks may do so without contraception, but this is something both/all partners are aware of and everyone agrees to before the play begins.
Breeding Kinks Are the Same Thing as Pregnancy Fetishes
Pregnancy kinks or fetishes usually center around the physical state of pregnancy and/or the pregnant body. Breeding kinks are more about the *possibility* of pregnancy and the associated risk and power dynamic at play.
Breeding Is the Same as a Creampie Kink
Not so, folks! While ejaculation is a major part of most breeding kinks, there's more to it than having a thing for creampies—aka when semen visibly drips out of a vagina or anus after ejaculation. “Arousal from creampies is often associated with the feeling and look of [ejaculate], not the act of fertilization from the [ejaculate],” Karsh explains.
Expert-Approved Tips for Practicing a Breeding Kink in a Safe Way
Think breeding is something you might be into? Here are some expert-backed tips for safely engaging in this kind of play and minimizing risk.
Use Non-Visible Contraception
Contraceptives like pills, rings, IUDs, and implants prevent pregnancy, but aren’t visible. This can help lean into the fantasy of breeding without actually risking pregnancy, says Karsh. “If we cannot see birth control actively working to stop impregnation, it may help heighten the fantasy.”
Get Tested for STIs
Breeding kinks often involve and eroticize fluid-bonded sex (aka sex without barrier methods like condoms). Criss says that it’s incredibly important to get tested regularly for STIs, especially if you’re not planning to use condoms or other barrier methods with partners. Knowing your status can keep you and your partners safe. If you’re not using condoms, getting on PreP is also a great idea.
Try an Ovipositor
If a sci-fi, alien-breeding kink is what you’re after, you can buy ovipositors to use as part of your role-play. “An ovipositor is a sex toy, similar to a dildo, with a hole at one end for loading the egg, and another at the other end for depositing the egg,” Pearson says. “This helps bring the breeding fantasy to life by allowing you to plant eggs in any orifice large enough on the person who is to be ‘bred.’”
TL;DR, breeding kinks are seriously varied, and the ways they’re practiced will depend on what individuals and their partners want from the experience. If breeding is something you’re interested in playing with in your own bedroom, make sure you communicate, figure out what works for everyone involved, play safe, and enjoy yourselves.
